We scheduled the c-section for Wednesday November 17th and leading up to this date I was a wreck. By wreck I mean, don't look at me, talk to me, ask me how I am doing because I WILL cry and I might be sarcastic and rude in my reply. The mere thought of the surgery (not the sweet baby) sent me into a complete panic and it became all consuming. Before you judge on why I had a c-section read here and it explains the reason for the necessary c-section.
So I make it to Wednesday, we get checked in and I am still not thinking this would happen today for some reason. Everything is going normal and we were assigned a nurse who as we spoke with, we told her our story of how we got here. I think it came up the second time she asked if I wanted my tubes tied.....thats a fun conversation by the way, seeing how people react and especially in a hospital where most people think you should only have two kids and anymore is crazy. She took a liking to us and we "won her over" with our quick wit and funny banter back and forth. Again, all was going smooth on the outside but on my inside I was going crazy.
Meanwhile cut to my husband who I know is nervous because he is playing games feverishly on his phone and he kept trying to be funny. Some of the things he said we funny and I chalk that up to a blind squirrel finding a nut (just kidding Ryan!) So while on his phone he was on facebook and posted this on a pro-life fan page:
prayer request: my wife is having her 4th c-section today. It's truly a miracle we are having a baby. After listening to bad advice from doctors, we had a tubal ligation after our 3rd child. After much prayer, we decided to have a tubal reversal 13 months ago. By the Grace of God, we are welcoming Elijah Richard into the world today. Thank you for your prayers. god Bless You!
That fan page ended up reposting what Ryan had posted and within five minutes we had hundreds of "likes" and people saying they would pray for us. It was in that moment that I began to realize that this was all going to be just fine and that we were in God's hands.
We get to the surgery room and everything becomes a blur as I am thinking of how it would look if I just took off running, knocking things over and pushing people out of the way to get out of there. Since I didn't particually want to be on the news that day I decided to sit tight and take what was coming to me (at that point it is certain death in my head).
Meanwhile the staff of about 6 people at that point are all talking about Michelle Duggar. I was really thinking I was being punked because they were saying things like "that woman should get her tubes tied" "she as way too many kids" "how can they afford it" "she doesn't even mother them all anymore" At this point I was greatful that Ryan was not in the room at the moment because he might have said something, all I was doing was crying, and saying Hail Mary's over and over while the nurse who had been with me the whole day leaned over and was whispering "God is in this room" over and over. Then I remember the prayers, all the amazing prayers. People were praying for us in that moment, and all the moments leading up to this point. By the time Ryan got into the room I was joking with the doctors and just at an absolute level of peace with everything. Moments later our little miracle was born and I can't describe the emotions that Ryan and I shared. So personal, so incredible.
After the surgery in the recovery area all was well and our little miracle was doing just wonderful as was I. I just couldn't believe how great I felt. My only side effect was the tremedous shaking that I get and it seems to get worse everytime. This time however was different, if someone put their hand on me or I was holding Elijah, I stopped shaking. Pretty cool!
What a beautiful story!
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